The first time I met Jax Blackwood things went a little sideways. In my defense, I didn’t know he was Jax Blackwood—who expects a legendary rock star to be shopping for groceries? More importantly, a blizzard was coming and he was about to grab the last carton of mint-chocolate chip. Still, I might have walked away, but then he smugly dared me to try and take the coveted ice cream. So I kissed him. And distracted that mint-chip right out of his hands. Okay, it was a dirty move, but desperate times and all that. Besides, I never expected he’d be my new neighbor. An annoying neighbor who takes great pleasure in reminding me that I owe him ice cream but would happily accept more kisses as payment. An irresistible neighbor who keeps me up while playing guitar naked–spectacularly naked–in his living room. Clearly, avoidance is key. Except nothing about Jax is easy to ignore—not the way he makes me laugh, or that his particular brand of darkness matches mine, or how one look from him melts me faster than butter under a hot sun. Neither of us believes in love or forever. Yet we’re quickly becoming each other’s addiction. But we could be more. We could be everything. All we have to do is trust enough to fall.
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The air between us shifts. I’m filled with a strange giddiness, wanting to laugh for the fun of it, but I’m also too warm, my limbs oddly heavy as if simple movements might be too much for me. His tone turns soft and cajoling, teasing the truth out of me. “Are you going to tell me what you do?” When I say nothing, the corners of his eyes crinkle. “I see. You’re going to torture me a bit.” The warm, fuzzy feeling grows as I shrug. “Torture feels apropos in this scenario.” He hums again, taking another step toward me. “What makes you think I won’t like being tortured by you?” The heat of his body and the scent of his skin makes my head light and my pulse pound. How did it get to this point where the highlight of my day is flirting with Jax Blackwood? Despite the thrill, I know I’m in over my head. I haven’t gone out on a date in months because I form attachments, I get emotional, and then I hurt when they inevitably leave. And this man will leave. He is as bright and fleeting as a camera flash. I’ll be left with the image of him seared into my memory and nothing more. I tell myself all of this, the voice in my head as stern as possible. But it doesn’t make me back away. It doesn’t stop my body from somehow straining toward his without even moving. Because it might be stupid of me, but I want to feel something that isn’t planned. Something, for however briefly, that’s real. He’s too attuned to me not to notice. John’s lids lower as his attention slides down my body before easing back up to my face. Slowly, he rests his forearm on the wall beside my head. “Tell me, Stella,” he murmurs. “No,” I whisper back, flirting, even though I shouldn’t. His biceps bunch as he leans in, a smile dancing on his lips. “Tell.” My breasts graze his chest, and I feel it in my toes. “You’re crowding me.” I hate how breathy I sound. “Can’t help it.” His voice is a rumble, the heat of his breath playing over my skin. He ducks his head, drawing close until our lips nearly brush, and when he speaks again, his tone is almost conversational, except for the husky quality that touches deep within my core. “You smell like strawberries. Fucking delicious.” My lids flutter, and I swallow hard. “Ordinarily, I’d call you out on that cliché but since I’ve been eating strawberries, you aren’t exactly wrong.” His chuckle is slow and easy, as he eases back and his gaze slowly travels over my face. “Were they sweet, Stella Button?” He’s looking at my mouth like he might try to find out. My lips tremble in response, and John tracks the movement, his breathing getting deeper, faster. “You have two freckles on your lips. One on the top lip and one on the bottom corner.” Those damn freckles. They were the bane of my adolescence. I hid them with lipstick and silently cursed whenever someone mentioned them. Freckles don’t have any feelings, but I swear it’s as if he’s touching them. “You’re just noticing this?” I try to make it sound like a joke, but it comes out weak and thready. His own lips quirk. “Oh, I noticed. It’s distracting as hell. They’re like two little dots of butter toffee. Makes me want to lick them, get a taste.” Oh, God. Lick them, please. I can almost feel it. I want to feel it. No. Bad Stella. Behave. John’s lips part a fraction like he just might take that taste. “Back off,” I whisper. And yet somehow my traitorous hands find their way to his sides, running over the waistband of his jeans, holding him there. John makes a sound deep in his throat and tilts his hips, pressing them against mine. A distinctly thick bulge nudges my belly. Both of us lose a breath, and then he’s closer, his cheek touching my temple. “You’ll have to let me go first.” My thumbs slide under the edge of his shirt and find smooth, taut skin. A tremor goes through his body. I try to think, search for what the hell we’ve been talking about. His lips brush the crest of my cheek as he murmurs against my skin. “Tell me what you do, Stella. You know you want to.” My smile feels illicit. Somehow the action is directly tied to all my happy parts, making them draw hot and tight. “I don’t think I do.” Another hum. “Liar. You’re dying to.”
Fall is probably my favorite Kristen Callihan book to date and I've enjoyed every one I've read. There was just something More with this one. Fall delivers a romance, of course, but more than that it also gives a powerful truth the face of depression and it does so in a way that doesn't overpower the rest of the story.
Stella and John live two very different lives and yet they are also very similar in many ways though neither would have expected it. They meet in a very normal plain way - it's not everyday you run into a rockstar at the grocery store - and yet there is nothing plain about the connection that exists between them from that day forward.
Life has not been easy for either of these two beautiful people and yet they've found their places in the world even when they've wanted to give up. I loved that they shared such a deep understanding of each other and that it made them dig deeper with one another. There's a whole new level of trust between these two that seems to only exist between them and it's equal parts their respect for each other and their past pain and a desire to see the other happy but not even really understanding what it truly means either.
Both of these characters have been hurt, both of them want to shy away from real relationships, from commitment, and yet when they are together all they want is more. As they open up to each other more and more, it's clear to see that they love each other deeply, they've found the other half of themselves. But can they admit to those feelings and give love a real chance?
Fall was an emotional read, one that had me all up in my feels but also occasionally breathless - in anticipation, in fear, in a state of swoon - all of the above. It had me relating to the characters in a way I usually don't. Stella and John's story was moving in a way a lot of romances aren't and though this was a rockstar romance - it felt more than anything - like watching good friends finally get the love they deserved.
Kristen Callihan is an author because there is nothing else she’d rather be. She is a three-time RITA nominee and winner of two RT Reviewer’s Choice awards. Her novels have garnered starred reviews from Publisher’s Weekly and the Library Journal, as well as being awarded top picks by many reviewers. Her debut book FIRELIGHT received RT Magazine’s Seal of Excellence, was named a best book of the year by Library Journal, best book of Spring 2012 by Publisher’s Weekly, and was named the best romance book of 2012 by ALA RUSA. When she is not writing, she is reading.